Ha! Atinnukkeee!!! Please don’t do this. I want to call you but I’m afraid that you would be angry with me for disobeying your instruction. That’s why I’m sending this voice note. Ore mi! If you go ahead with this, you would not be ending the pain. You would be causing even greater pain. How in the world do you want me to explain to Itunu that her mother is dead? What would happen to the poor girl who you claim you love more than anyone in the world?
Heck, I’m nervous sending this voice note because I don’t even know if you are still around. Still alive. But I hope you are. Atinuke, you wonder why I was so close to you? Well, apart from the fact that you are a fish. Hehe. It is mainly because you are the only one I was comfortable being with. My Dad used to beat my mom and me whenever he was angry or drunk. He seemed to hate both of us. Upon enquiry, I found out that my Dad was forced to marry my Mum because he got her pregnant. So whenever he saw me, he was reminded of his mistake.
Tinuke love, it was with you that I found my worth. That I found my voice. That I discovered that I was not a mistake. That I was more than the product of a one night stand. So, when you got pregnant, as much as I was angry with you, I knew you needed love and I promised myself that you would get it.
Leaving the past, Tinu, when did you begin to have a selective memory? You said you are 29 and you are yet to get a reasonable job but you conveniently forget that your business is beginning to boom. You forget that last month you told me you made 60,000 naira profit. Me sef that I’m working in a big office, how much is my salary?
Tinuke, what do you want me to tell my husband who has been a big fan of yours ever since he met you? What do you I tell my children when they ask about aunty Tinu? How would I explain to Itunuoluwa? And you…what would you tell God when you stand before Him years before He expected you?
I know the sky is dark, but there are still some stars shining. Don’t do this, my dear. I don’t know how I would cope without you. I don’t know if I would ever forgive myself for not doing enough. Please stay. Stay with me. We will walk through this together. We will get professional help. Please stay, Atinuke… Pleassssseeeeeeee!!!